Why it Took Me Five Years to Talk About My Blog

Before I started this blog, I thought about starting one approximately 8472624635058 times. I put so so much thought into having a blog — well, thoughts, hopes, fears, dreams — it felt paralyzing. I didn’t want to go through the slow stages of a blog at the beginning. Everyone’s blog is a bit rocky when they start. Wrongly sized pictures, weird layouts, etc. Even some of my favorite blogs have humble beginnings with grainy, out of focus photos.

This blog started as a travel blog. One of my first posts was a travel manifesto in which I proclaimed I would be dedicated to travel for years to come. The hard thing about a travel blog is, if you’re not traveling, it’s challenging to find things to write about. Over the first few years, I relaxed into writing posts about other subjects, but I still did not feel confident. Imposter syndrome, fear of failure, a knowledge that most blogs take time to get to a solid place all led me to only sharing it with my closest friends and family.

Fast forward eight years (YIKES, EIGHT!) and now I tell everyone about it. Which sometimes feels reckless because I post very personal things here. Some posts seem like they’re ripped straight out of my journal, and that makes me feel vulnerable. So while I was working through that vulnerability and general fear, I started to tell people in my life about my blog.

When I had cancer, especially, I told everyone about my blog. It saved me from keeping everyone updated on my medical status which is hard to talk about over and over again when faced with loving friends and family. Especially when the news was dire.

So here’s my advice: if you are starting a blog, you are going to have humble beginnings too. And that’s okay! It doesn’t feel okay, but trust me, just do the damn thing. This space has enriched my life so much, and I am so proud of myself for starting that January day in 2014.

xMaegan

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