A Blogging Stupor

Over the last eight years I’ve been writing my blog, I’ve tried many different ways of managing it and keeping myself motivated. I’ve written only when I felt creative, I’ve planned out three weeks of content, I’ve done a mixture of both, and I also tried working in batches. I tried traveling and writing on my adventures. I tried writing five posts per week, three posts per week, and even one a week. It feels like I’ve tried it all. And now it feels I’m getting a bit disillusioned.

When I take a step back to look at how much time and money it costs me to keep this blog going, continuing to put energy into this feels draining and pointless. Other than getting to connect with readers and people leaving comments, I’m not finding much joy in this anymore. Over the years I’ve been blogging, I’ve made a total of $9 and some change. I know the ingredient I am missing, after listening to all the podcasts and reading all the books about blogging. And that is consistency. I have never been able to maintain consistent blog posts for more than a few months at a time. The best advice I read/heard was be consistent in your posts for a year. I am currently deciding if I have the stamina for that.

My 20s were so, so tumultuous. I had cancer two times, I came out two times, I chose the wrong things for me over and over again, I moved to Colorado without knowing more than two people who live here, I became a pet mom, I had to completely start over again twice. So being consistent with blog posts felt like it didn’t matter. I sewed up my broken heart time and time again, so writing about where I travel (which is very privileged to even be able to take time off to travel) didn’t feel so important.

Now that I’ve dealt with my shit and can now own it, my life feels more stable than I’ve felt in years. I know how to set boundaries and when to say no. I can advocate for myself without yelling at everyone in sight. I journal almost every day, and I’ve been writing fiction and have returned to my sci-fi novel in hopes of finishing it. I feel there is room for me in my life — my heart, my brain — now to be consistent. I just want to find joy in it again.

With that being said, I’m going to try several different things that I haven’t before. Most of what I’ve tried in the past has been behind the scenes, so now you may see some changes. We will both like and dislike what I try, and that’s okay. But I need to dig deeper and bolster my resolve to commit to trying.

I’m not ready to give up yet!

Do you have any suggestions for how to be consistent with blogging, or anything really? I’d love to learn from you.

xMae

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